What’s with the Cattitude?
Anyone owned by a frisky feline knows that cats are fickle creatures at best and can be downright ornery when the mood strikes them. One minute they are lying in your lap basking in all your love and affection and the next, they are using your leg as a launch pad.
Unlike dogs, who tend to wait until the Roomba fires up to have a major meltdown, cats do not seem to have any rhyme or reason for their dramatic cattitudes; or do they? Maybe it’s the call of wild coming out and turning your cute kitty into a Sabre Tooth Tiger, or maybe they are hyper tuned to stimulus around them. Could it be cats have supersonic hearing or is it possible our feline friends just enjoy being quirky for the humans they entertain?
Get cozy with some catnip and enjoy this list of cat-tastic actions and why cats perform them!
1. Ready, Set, Pounce!
Cats like to keep their humans in a constant state of awareness by reminding you to never let your guard down. They may be lurking in the shadows while you garden or way up high on a cabinet somewhere, but make no mistake, eventually every cat owner gets pounced on. Cats will typically do this if they want attention or if they are ready to play (you didn’t actually expect those flowers to stay upright in the pot, did you?) but occasionally, it’s simply to get a reaction out of their human.
2. The Side Swipe
“Hey! You’ve only dangled the feather in my face 157 times,” yowls Fifi, “it’s not over till your arm falls off!” And she further showcases her disapproval by swiping at you as you try to get away. This behavior is pretty straight forward; you had the nerve to try and leave the party before your cat was done having fun, and now you must pay!
3. Needing to Knead
You know the drill. You have just settled in your favorite chair to watch The Aristocats with your afghan on and bowl of popcorn in your lap when surprise! Duchess decides to view the movie from the center of your chest. She settles in all sweet and purrs gently as she kneads your blanket into a lump. Many people might think this is so she can show her undying love for you, but when it comes to kneading, cats are actually marking their territory. There are scent glands on the soft pads on the bottom of their paws so kneading onto a surface, such as your lap, helps activate these scent glands.
4. The 50 Yard Stare
It is entirely possible that the term “the evil eye” was coined by someone being stared down by a cat. If you ever get that hair- standing -up- on- the -back -of -your -neck sensation, look around for a pair of glassy cat’s eyes before calling in the S.W.A.T. team. Cats are visual hunters, and chances are, if they are giving you a stoic stare they are likely just watching to see if you might do anything interesting so, you know, they can pounce!
5. The Twitchy Tail
As you pass the window an odd sight catches your eye. Felix the cat is standing in the middle of the garden, completely motionless like a mime, with just the tip of his tail flicking back and forth. You consider tapping on the window to break his eerie spell but are quickly reminded of how cats don’t get mad, they get even, so you search instead for the object of his desire. When a cat is this intrigued by something in his environment it is usually prey, but it could be as simple as a sound he hasn’t heard before. His freeze frame is a show of patience so as not to draw attention to himself until he is ready to make his move.
6. Cat Scratch Fever
There is a catnip scented kitty condo taking up the space in your garage, (this way, ALL the neighborhood cats can take turns sliding down your car’s windshield since it’s parked on the street) a scratching post in every room, and a life-sized artificial tree where your bed used to be and yet, Sugar Plum insists on shredding your couch…and your curtains…and your new suit…but why? Because much like her dough making abilities, cat scratches are a claim to fame; not just by the scent that’s left behind, but the bonus visual they convey. Cat scratches on your favorite things tell the hood cats that “you may slip and slide off the Mercedes at night, but I own the mansion!”
7. Tsk Tsk Hiss!
Maybe there was an unwanted visitor slithering down your driveway, or a territorial alley cat looking to expand his boundaries. Or maybe, you just tried to move your thirty-pound hairball off your legs to regain feeling in them, and the response was a long and sinister hiss. Most commonly used as a defense mechanism for fear or stress, your furious feline will also send you their hiss of disapproval if you are inconveniencing them or making them uncomfortable. (doesn’t matter that your legs are purple due to lack of circulation, they were napping!)
8. Wide Eyed Wonder
You just got home from Cats R Us and are trying to unload the 14 bags of pet supplies while not disturbing Peaches’ afternoon nap. She is right in front of the door you’re dragging the bags through, of course, and just when you think you have maneuvered through the maze of cat traps, you step on one of her realistic mice (note to self, buy the burlap one’s next time) and you scream. Peaches responds by leaping 15 feet in the air, tail bushed out and eyes as wide as saucers. When cats’ pupils dilate to twice their size, it can equally mean surprise or fear. If you are to blame for this emotional reaction, hopefully a new toy or a cat treat can stave off the kitty counselor.
9. Purrrrfect Purr
Nothing says “I love you” like the rumbling sound of your cat’s motor purring you a fuzzy lullaby. While it is true that kitties will purr as a symbol of contentment and undying love, they will also cue up a tune when they are stressed out and trying to self soothe, much like a child rocks himself to sleep when he’s scared. And all this time you thought those were love songs for your ears only, silly human!
10. Rambunctious Leg Rubs
You could be on a conference call with your boss or in the middle of a battle with masked marauders, but when it’s time to eat your cat will expect the earth to stand still until you fill their food bowl. They may start off with subtle hints like biting your neck or howling in your ear, but eventually they will weave in and out of your legs with every step you take so you are fully aware of how put off and out they are that you did not get the clue the first time!
Our feline friends may have their own precocious way of doing things that we mere mortals will never fully understand, but one fact is for sure, this world would be a much dimmer place without cats and their cattitudes!
